American Gladiators

Recently I was thrilled to learn that ESPN Classic airs reruns of American Gladiators every night at 11 o'clock. For me this has meant less sleep, but it has also meant a great deal more laughing about blunt force trauma caused to mullet-wearing heads. Nitro, Gemini, Thunder, and the gang... oh, the flashbacks.

My ninth-grade Geometry teacher took a month off of work (probably for a medical procedure of some kind), and he told us he wouldn't be around because he was trying out for American Gladiators. Some of the students believed him, but I knew the show well enough to know that "Out-Weigh All of the Gladiators Combined" wasn't one of their events. Too bad, though... he would have smoked them in that.

Is American Gladiators the best TV show ever? Probably not. But is it the best show ever about over-grown beast-people using padded clubs and tennis ball guns to beat the crap out of bus drivers and grocery store clerks? I dare to assume that it's at least in the top four or five. Seriously - what's not to like? It's a recipe for magic! Thank heavens for reruns.

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